Have you ever woken up in a cold sweat first thing in the morning with the realization that you forgot to be the Tooth Fairy? Talk about serious mom guilt!
It’s so easy to remember being Santa or the Easter Bunny. But when it comes to the Tooth Fairy let’s face it, she is a third-tier magical figure and entirely forgettable.
She is like that great aunt that you forget to send a Christmas card to or that task on your to-do list that you just can’t get to…like making the appointment with the vet for your dog’s annual check up or responding to that “not even close to your goals” request from your boss.
But for your kid, losing a tooth is a right of passage. A major topic of conversation with his or her friends that’s all about comparing notes and trading status updates. “How many teeth did you lose?” “How much did the Tooth Fairy give you?” “I got five dollars for my molar.”
It’s a perfect storm of high expectations from your child’s point of view and low priority for you when it comes to being the guardian of your kid’s magical world.
Tooth Fairy F-ups
As a busy working mom, I have woken up in a panic more than once, with the realization that I f-d up the tooth fairy thing. And you might be thinking, what about Dad? He perhaps didn’t remember either but if you are in any sort of a partnership for any length of time, you have already established the separation of duties, whatever those are. “I do laundry and my partner cooks”…”I take the trash out and my partner does the yard work…” You know the drill and more than likely – and this is based on my unscientific survey, it’s Mom who is the designated gate-keeper of the children(s) magical existence.
So back to the cold sweats…I did the first part right, I helped my daughter with the final pull of that loose tooth that was just hanging out of her mouth for days. I got the cool plastic mega-tooth chamber for her freshly extracted, bloody bit of enable-covered bone and made sure it was tucked under her pillow as I kissed her good night.
Then it was onto the evening routine. Clean up the kitchen, get lunches made, get back online and finish those emails I couldn’t get to during the day, then a few exhausted minutes with my husband before collapsing in my own bed.
Then came first light and that sinking realization that I f-d up.
The bloody tooth was still in it’s tooth-shaped plastic container. There were no shining coins or stiff dollar bills under my daughter’s pillow. Crap!
In my case I was able to save myself by tiptoeing downstairs, grabbing the last wilted dollar bill I had in my wallet and slipping into my daughter’s room just as she was waking up. I deftly inserted the dollar under her pillow while smoothing her hair and kissing her cheek – classic distraction method. However, I failed to grab the tooth so I still had to think quick when I saw the bewildered look on her face….”wait a minute, the fairy didn’t take my tooth. Why not? Is there something wrong with it?” “Well dear, the fairy was in a big hurry and wasn’t able to grab it – leave it under your bed one more night and maybe she will come back for it.”
Other times I have not been so lucky. And I have had to look into those little disappointed eyes and cop a bald lie for that fairy. “Don’t worry dear, the fairy didn’t forget you, she just had a busy night – try again tomorrow night.”
I admit, in those moments I feel like I have let my child down. I felt like I was not bringing my “A” game to the motherhood thing – not even close.
But as I started sharing my story with other busy working moms, I realized I wasn’t alone. It turns out being the Tooth Fairy was something many of us moms forget from time to time. And I learned a few other techniques in case the Tooth Fairy thing falls through the cracks for you.
Here are three techniques you can use – after of course you forgive yourself for not having that fairy’s back. But let’s face it, what has she ever done for you?
- Put it back on your kid: “Oh the fairy didn’t come? Well did you go to bed on time?”
- Pivot: “Maybe she left the money somewhere else in the house – oh look, it’s under the toaster!”
- Defer: “Honey, the fairy only covers “fill in the state/province” every other day. You have to try again tonight.
Wrapping It Up
It’s funny how for the most part, it’s mom’s job to be the guardian of their kid’s magical world. Don’t get me wrong, Dad comes through in a pinch. But I find that women tend to be the ones who stay up late or sometimes all night to make sure the Christmas experience is magical. And it’s not a labor without reward. What’s better than the look on a child’s face Christmas morning when they get that thrill that Santa came…that they were remembered and special.
Maybe that’s why it’s so painful when those Tooth Fairy F-ups happen. We want to preserve and extend that magical world for our kids for as long as possible.
Do you have a Tooth Fairy f-up you would like to share? We would love to hear your story and any tips you have to keep the magic alive.
This is great and I totally relate! I have had that experience as had my daughter. The tooth fairy leaves even more money on day 2!